Hi!

I am a mom of five and married to the love of my life, who continues to heal my soul. I love my babies, my bestie, the beach, all things Vizsla, and champagne. I am messy, imperfect, and broken but healing, and I have no contact with my entire family. But I have my peace, my sweet babies, my husband, and my chosen family.

I am also a former:

~daughter

~step-daughter

~sister

~aunt

So, I have a covert passive-aggressive narcissistic mother, an ass-hole dad, and a bonus: a toxic, enabling, alcoholic stepmom PLUS a golden child brother! Yaaayyyy!!! I won the toxic family jackpot!

I finally woke up, realized my worth, and went no contact with all of them. When I did, though, I found that the societal perceptions associated with going no contact with toxic family members, well, SUCKED! I felt like a terrible person.

What defines me?

My character.

What doesn’t define me?

The toxic family that I came from and the fact that I want literally nothing to do with them.

So, what the hell happened? You don’t talk to ANYONE in your family? YOU must be the problem.

Well, after a lifetime of manipulation, being discarded a thousand times by my covert narcissistic mother, and having my dad tell me that I was dead to him. I legit had to rebrand. I thought to myself, these relationships are crushing my soul. If anyone else treated me or my children this way, I would stay as far away from them as possible! Why should toxic, emotionally abusive family get a pass?

When I was finally brave enough to go no contact, I felt like a villain in society. I mean, what kind of deplorable human chooses to never talk to their family again?

Cue the shit that people say:

“But it’s your mom!”

“How can you NOT talk to your family.”

“You will regret it when they die!”

“You cut off your family; your kids will do the same thing to you.”

Ok, Sharon.

So, why create a podcast and talk about my no-contact journey with my toxic family? Doesn’t that make you just as toxic?

Well, I will say this: I don’t remember signing a non-disclosure agreement when I exited the womb in 1976 that prevented me from speaking about happenings that I would experience growing up in my family.

That being said, when I went no contact, my heart shifted. I was no longer responsible for returning to my family for more emotional abuse. I became empowered by my story and my journey instead of ashamed.

One day, while driving, I heard the song, ‘Matilda,’ by Harry Styles. I listened to the lyrics and could. Not. Stop. Crying. I pulled myself together, and it hit me…maybe there are other Matilda’s out there who need to be reminded that going no contact does not make them a shitty person. I wondered if maybe others could benefit from a podcast about the ups and downs of this no-contact-with-toxic family journey. And so, the Character Outs podcast was born.

What does ‘character outs’ even mean?

 

“Character outs, character always outs.”

A phrase my covert narcissistic mother would use at nauseam to describe anyone she didn’t like, which, let’s be honest, was just about everyone. Character outs, meaning everyone will reveal their true character in time. What poetic irony that it was my mother’s true character that finally came out, and it was not pretty.

What is my mission?

I am on a mission to normalize going (and staying) no-contact with toxic family, break toxic generational cycles, validate those who are in the sea of no contact, and remind them to keep walking. The Character Outs podcast was created to empower anyone feeling lost, alone, and like the villain for walking away from their toxic family. This no-contact journey has its ups and downs, and we talk about all of it.

Welcome, friend. If no one has told you lately, it’s not you, never has been. You don’t have to fix it, and you are not alone.

 

Check out the latest podcast episode here:

 

Have some tissues ready…..